Being a good host is an enjoyable but challenging task, as is being a pleasant guest. Sometimes it happens that you are invited to visit not for a couple of hours, but for several days - to another city, country - or it so happens that you need to live with someone while your apartment is being renovated. There is a certain etiquette that will allow you to be the kind of guest that is eagerly awaited again.
"No" to surprises
Agree on the dates of your visit in advance, ask the hosts when it will be convenient for them, and try to adapt to their wishes as much as possible. Don't say, "We'll arrive at about that date." Ask: "Can we live with you from this to such?" Never show up on your doorstep without warning, even if you are sure it will be a wonderful surprise. Come up with some other pleasant surprise. Also, you should not come with friends, children, animals, if you have not agreed on this in advance. There is no need to think out for the owners, when and to whom they will be glad - ask, ask and ask again.
"Yes" to gifts
Be sure to buy your hosts something as a gift, but it should be a souvenir that fits your budget, not an expensive, pretentious thing. Also, it should not be a "dust collector", something bulky or unnecessarily souvenir - a figurine, a vase, a plush toy. Good gifts are:
- if you are coming from another city / country, local delicacies;
- things for the collection of the owners, if you know that they are fond of collecting something;
- souvenirs from your friends' vish-list;
- good wine, tea or coffee, depending on the taste preferences of the owners;
- potted or cut flowers for the hostess.
Know the "charter of someone else's monastery"
To avoid any misunderstandings, check with the hosts about the internal routines of their home. What time are they used to getting up and going to bed? When should you not use the bathroom? Are there any special rules for children and / or pets? Is there something that the owners consider to be an important rule in their home? Pay attention to how the owners walk around their territory - if it is customary in the house to go out to breakfast in a home dress, you will look somewhat piquant in a light robe. And vice versa, if the owners greet the morning relaxed, maybe it is not worth showing up in full dress?
Help, but don't be boss
Offer your help when needed:
- set the table;
- wash the dishes;
- stop by for any products;
- play with children or take a walk with the dog.
Most likely, the hosts will reject your offers, but they will be pleased.
Don't even ask, but just, as a matter of course:
- clean your plate after a meal;
- buy some foods that you consider important in your diet;
- keep your children busy with quiet games;
- if you take the owners' car, do not forget to refill the full tank.
At the same time, if you buy any special products for yourself, take them with the expectation of everyone. You can buy no more than you need, only if you know that neither the owners nor households eat such food.
If you forget some toiletries, ask the hosts where you can buy them. Most likely, you will be offered to use their paste / shampoo / cream, but do not immediately ask if you can take the master's. Don't put people in an awkward position because of your forgetfulness. In addition, never take the last food from the refrigerator - perhaps the hostess has set aside this fruit for the child, and without the last sip of milk she will not be able to cook the porridge planned for the morning.
Don't be the boss - no need to wash, clean, sweep and lay out, unless you are asked to do so!
Have fun
The hosts don't have to entertain you. They may be happy to take part in your cultural program, but they don't have to invent it for you. If you are going to see another city / country, discuss with the hosts in advance where you want to visit and what to see, perhaps they themselves will offer to accompany you or tell you how best to plan your trip, but do not expect them to be your default Chicherone.
Leave beautifully
On the day of departure, check to see if you have left your belongings in your assigned room and bathroom. Do not think that the owners themselves will throw out the tube with the remains of the paste, they should not clean up after you. Remove the sheets and fold them neatly. If you took any things - books, glasses, toys - return them to the designated places or put them somewhere in plain sight.
Thank the hosts for their hospitality, not only when you leave. Send them a letter of thanks (e-mail) when you get home. Describe how you enjoyed staying with them and how happy you would be to see them return.
