There are many prescriptions for how to properly conduct memorial dinners. Some of them have their basis in Christianity, others are alien to the worldview of an Orthodox person.
One of the traditions related to the commemoration is the practice of eating food at the memorial table exclusively with spoons. You can often hear expressions that it is strictly forbidden to eat with forks at the commemoration. However, this perception has nothing to do with the meaning of Orthodox commemoration, therefore the Church does not prohibit the use of forks in the memorial meal.
It is worth figuring out where the tradition of not using forks at the commemoration came from. Often the adherents of this opinion themselves cannot give a clear answer. Some suggestions can be made on this score. So, historically, forks were not used during memorial meals. However, this was not due to any religious prescriptions, but the usual absence of forks as such in the old days. You can consider this issue from the household side. For example, forks are undesirable because they are a sharp object that can injure a person. They were excluded from the memorial table setting so that people, during the division of the inheritance, would not hurt each other in a rage. These explanations have nothing to do with Orthodox culture. It is difficult to imagine a real Orthodox commemoration with a bloody massacre. If you look at it, it is not the fork itself that is "evil", but the person who practices violence. According to such concepts, absolutely any object can be prohibited, but the Church in this sense does not go to the point of insanity.
Some consider the forks to be a reminder of the demonic tridents, which contributes to the view of the fork as a demonic object. But even this perception should not have a place in the consciousness of a person. If there are any indirect references to the presence of tridents or other sharp "weapons" in demons, then this must be understood not purely materially, but figuratively. In light of this, it is completely wrong to transfer such ideas to our world, forbidding the use of a completely convenient object for eating food.
Thus, there is nothing wrong with using forks at the commemoration. An Orthodox person needs to focus not on such practices, but on the very essence of remembrance, which consists in remembering the deceased, praying for him and doing good deeds as a memory of the deceased.
